Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Randomize
