hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
