About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
