i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I was randomly pulled aside to have my bag checked. It had 50 condoms in it.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
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