...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
