Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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