JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Randomize
