I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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