After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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