i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Randomize
