so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I filled two of the glass ornaments in my mom's bathroom last night with vodka. That way no one sees me drinking on Christmas. Alcoholic or genius? All I know it makes bathroom trips frequent and enjoyable.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Randomize
