just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Randomize
