OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
