I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize