Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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