You can't special order awesome
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
