If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I woke up at 1pm, looked in the mirror and fist pumped...I might still be drunk
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Randomize