Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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