His pubic hair was longer than his dick
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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