my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Went to bed still wearing my bralette. When I was changing this morning, a Tootsie Roll fell out. I'm definitely living my best life.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
