remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
Randomize
