The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
