Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Randomize
