I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
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