I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
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