Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
so let's talk penis.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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