Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
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