You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize
