yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
