Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Saw a guy in a chef outfit covered in mustard talking jiberish into his phone running across the skywalk.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
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