I woke up with fried rice in my sweatshirt pocket came downstairs and found all the chicken in the fridge gone. I'm THAT roommate aren't I?
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
The air was thick with penises
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
So congratulations, your penis has now sent me to urgent care not once, but twice!
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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