I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
