Got a toothbrush?
I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
