wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Randomize
