I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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