Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Randomize