with your own penis?
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize
