I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
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