Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had me at "let me see your balls"
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize