and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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