My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
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