My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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