I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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