I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
Randomize
