I can tuck mytits in my pants
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?