Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
home. puking in laundry basket.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
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My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
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I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair