so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
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