I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't trust your balls anymore.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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