Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Randomize
