remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
