Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
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Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
My butt remains clenched, sir.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
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