escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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