bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Randomize